THE GREATEST SECOND-CHANCE FROG QUEEN (Part 7-Wrap up from Queen Gertrude)
(If you need PROOF that this FROG-TALK actually happened, buy some $10 evidence: <https://www.amazon.com/Greatest-Second-Chance-Frog-Queen/dp/1006528679/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=>).
HUMAN VERSUS FROG BODIES (HOW WOULD U LIKE 2 B DISSECTED?)
Funny thing is that high school students in biology classes know more about what's inside our frog bodies than they are aware of what's going on right inside their own skin. They can spend a couple of days dissecting our brothers with little carving knives, staring at all our blood and guts as the teacher instructs them to view our little heart, lungs, stomach, and intestines. But they fail to make the tiniest comparison, realizing that frogs and humans are ridiculously similar. Check it out:
We both have beating hearts, both have to breathe (already mentioned we get air through our porous skin...), digest food and expel waste, pooping like every human who ever lived. Now, we don't claim that humans evolved from us (we aren't apes, are we?), but animals and humans are still very much 'brothers' are we not? We get squashed, eaten, cleared from land for your subdivisions, in general treated like second-class citizens of this hurdling globe through space called EARTH.
Someone coined the phrase "rivet hypothesis," to highlight the importance of every living creature on the planet as part of the structure of health overall. Such that, if the rivets that hold an aircraft wing together start to disappear it won't be long before the entire wing falls off. And we know that will be disastrous.
Frogs are that rivet.
Pardon me while I re-list a few of our superior-2-humans FROG characteristics:
1. We don't even have five fingers on our hands, but can grip things with our hand-and-feet pads. So amazing is our technology that humans have studied it and stolen it for various 'Space-Race' applications.
2. We are cuter than humans.
3. We don't use money to buy/sell, interact or punish other frogs by withholding basic necessities.
4. We adapt well to our environment, and don't make changes to it that threaten the survival of all creatures on the planet.
5. We are an inspiring bunch – actually the most popular amphibian image if you add up everything from frog posters to frog-shaped key rings, frog-pictured sheets and pillowcases.
6. We don't have our pad(s) on the nuclear button.
7. Our super-lethal skin poison may lead to major breakthroughs in medicine for humans.
8. We've been around much longer that humans, so give us some r..e..s..p..e..c..t. We have the record for on-earth existence
9. We don't ruin the environment.
10. We don't make too much noise. Aside from a few croaks, we’re almost as quiet as a mouse.
EPILOGUE
After the massive 180 km across asteroid collided with Earth in Mexico something like 66 million years ago, probably resulting in the death of huge and smaller dinosaurs that ruled the globe, we little ones emerged as a predominant species.
While we had successfully been around before the impact of that rock from space, we made changes, adapting well to the new drastic conditions. For instance, if our stomach suddenly held a harmful toxin we were able to burp the whole thing out of our body and clean it off with our cute little frog legs. And when there was a minimum of wetness – no moisture – we, of the Giant Waxy Treefrog clan, developed a method of producing a waxy substance. that we use to coat our skin to protect our water content.
So, without nuclear-tipped missiles or handguns we just plod along, jump along, watch humans from the sidelines as you continue to shoot yourselves in the foot. All the mechanized inventions man has come up with don't seem to really be extending the survival rate of your species, in fact actually doing just the opposite. A nuclear war will ruin all the food and air systems you depend on for daily life. If worst comes to worst we frogs, on the other hand, will probably be able to adapt as we've always done,
Hope to talk 2 U hu-mans and hu-women again, maybe around the next Millennium.
That is…if we find any of you still around!––
Good luck,
Q. Gertrude
Hope you Substackers enoyed this last Frog-Talk entry from THE GREATEST SECOND-CHANCE FROG QUEEN book /the final “FROG” posting that’s coming onto Substack…
THAT IS…unless you can talk that “Rick-of-Substack” guy into running another frog-related series he’s written, back in the twenty-teens. I’m thinking of his Kindle, hard & soft-cover edition; “TWELVE DEAD FROGS and Other Stories—A Filmmaker’s Memoir” ©2017). Click on link below to get a look:
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/35987705-twelve-dead-frogs-and-other-stories-a-filmmaker-s-memoir?ac=1&from_search=true&qid=qbv73sVQyQ&rank=1
Some pretty decent “frog-interactions” in that one, if I do croak myself, plus some filmmaking-and-real-life heavy shit in there (OOPs! Pardon my French. So un-lady-like!) At any rate, maybe check it out, Q.G.
Love the Frog Queen stories! Please excuse this silly pun: Gertrude spoke of the "rivet" hypothesis to underline the importance of every species. I wonder if when she talks about this to other frogs she uses her "rivet", "rivet", "rivet" voice.
Most enjoyable. Thanks, Rick!